it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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