My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
