haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize