Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
