i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I have fence marks all over my body
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize