I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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