Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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