i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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