You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
