its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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