yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
