i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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