Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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