I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
