I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
