Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
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