I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
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