He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize