i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
