So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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