Buhtt sex?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
