who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
