So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
