i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
