wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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