My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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