if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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