Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
