I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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