Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
