I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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