that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
