I wish I could teleport
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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