Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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