Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
So gin and wine won't be happening again
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
