I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
