yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
