Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
