Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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