Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
