don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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