So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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