my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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