Have you finally orgasmed yet?
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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