and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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