New invention idea: vibrating tampons
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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