No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
