Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Randomize