Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
