we're blogging at a bar
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize