those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
